I remember the day my son was born. They placed him in my arms, and I waited. And waited. And waited some more. Surely, at any moment, the instruction manual would appear. Spoiler alert: it never did.

I didn’t expect confetti or trumpets—his presence alone was life-altering enough. But let me tell you, life-altering doesn’t even begin to cover parenting a child on the autism spectrum. It’s like stepping into a marathon you didn’t train for, only to realize the course is uphill both ways, and everyone’s speaking a language you don’t understand.

Before I had my son, I used to pray: Please, God, don’t let me be an unrealistic parent. I just want to be realistic. Cute, right? Life, of course, had other plans. When my son started showing signs of autism, I didn’t magically morph into Supermom. Nope. I struggled, just like any parent in that situation. But then I did the thing that matters most: I searched for support.

Parenting isn’t about knowing everything—it’s about learning. Constantly. Relentlessly. Sometimes painfully. It’s about getting your butt handed to you on a regular basis and still showing up for round two. And three. And, well, you get the idea.

Let me be clear: there’s no shame in not knowing what to do. Most of us are out here flying blind, improvising on the spot, and silently wishing for a “Do Over” button. (Still waiting on that one, by the way.) But here’s the truth: being open to seeking help is your biggest strength as a parent. It’s not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign you care enough to learn and grow for your child’s sake.

Because when it comes to our kids, ignorance is not bliss. Pretending you’ve got it all figured out while your child struggles isn’t helping anyone—least of all them. Your child is the one who will carry the result of your denial. Instead, embrace the “I don’t know, but I’m willing to find out” mindset. Be realistic about what’s happening with your child, and don’t hesitate to get the support you need.

Parenting isn’t about being perfect; it’s about being present and willing to adapt. So let’s make it possible for our kids to thrive, even in the face of challenges. Seek support. Ask questions. And remember: this journey isn’t about knowing everything—it’s about showing up and learning along the way.